IF MOSES WERE ALIVE TODAY...

"The role of the journalist in America is to harass money and power on behalf of the American taxpayer, as, historically, when money and power are able to operate without public accountability, they steal all the money. The only way you keep those with money and power from stealing everybody else's money is by harassing them to no end, every day, day after day, and ask them intelligent questions and ask them as to why they are doing what they are doing."

- Dylan Ratigan, MSNBC -


We have recently emerged from Yom Kippur, one of the holiest days for Jews; a day of atonement and recompense, and we are on the verge of yet another Jewish (Saturday) and Christian (Sunday) Sabbath, so I thought it fitting to produce this post at this time. Agnostics and atheists, please bear with me. You may even find SOMETHING you can appreciate in this post.

Christians and Jews both believe that God gave Moses a set of Ten Commandments for humankind to follow many years ago. If Moses were alive today, he would undoubtedly be more sophisticated and developed a person than those alive in his actual time period thousands of years beforehand were. So naturally, upon his descent from a modern-day mountain, his arms would be laden with a more sophisticated and developed Ten Commandmebts, which I believe would consist of something like this...

1. I am the Lord thy God; thou shalt not have false gods before me.
That's right: don't worship money, posessions, status, fame, sports figures, rock stars, earthly rulers, or idols. Stick with the Real Thing!

2. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.
Don't use the Lord's name in a profane manner, and don't wrap yourself in Him for the purpose of justifying war or advancing your favorite politocal party. While you're at it, read Matthew 25: 34-46.

3. Remember to keep holy the Sabbath.
Take a day off to think of and worship your Lord, and don't forget to think about how your actions have impacted those around you.

4. Honor thy father and thy mother.
Children: mind your parents. Adults: remember the lessons your parents taught you, and abide by them.

5. Thou shalt not kill.
Do not take the life of another, be it in sport, war, or for punishment. Do not have abortions as matters of convenience or economy, or solely to avoid embarrassment.


6. Thou shalt not commit adultery.
Do not engage in sex with another's partner, wife, or husband. This means DON'T HAVE AFFAIRS!

7. Thou shalt not steal.
Don't take that which isn't yours. Don't pad your work hours or cheat on your taxes. Don't exploit others for your own gain. Don't overcharge. Don't underpay. THIS MEANS YOU, HEALTH INSURANCE COMPANIES, BANKS, PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANIES, AND OTHER CORPORATIONS AS WELL AS ALL WORKERS!

8. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.
Don't lie, especially about or to thers. THIS MEANS YOU, RUSH LIMBAUGH, GLENN BECK, ANN COULTER, MICHELLE MALKIN, SEAN HANNITY, BILL O'REILLY, SARAH PALIN, MICHELE BACHMANN, BILL CLINTON, MICHAEL SAVAGE, JOHN BOEHNER, ERIC CANTOR, JIM DeMINT, VLADIMIR PUTIN, MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD, LOU DOBBS, KIM IL SUNG, DICK CHENEY, LIZ CHENEY, DONALD RUMSFELD, GEORGE W. BUSH, WILLIAM JEFFERSON, hyperbolic Democratic and Republican operatives, and all other dishonest pundits, politicians, criminals, and everybody else.

9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife.
Don;t lust after or mess with another person's partner; do not break up another person's family or house.

10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's goods.
Don't lust after other people's possessions; forget about keeping up with the Joneses; and don't chase status symbols or be vain or proud.